8 Tips For True INFJ Empathy Protection

Whether you’re a natural empath, a highly sensitive person, an INFJ, or all of the above, protecting your energy is nothing short of a necessity to avoid emotional and mental burnout. Being natural givers can surely attract the wrong company, and unfortunately, it’s the responsibility of the beholder to protect this precious gift. But sometimes it’s easier said than done. Welcome or welcome back Psycho! Today we’re going to be talking about the 8 ways INFJs can protect themselves from toxic people.

Number 1:

Learn to recognize toxic personalities INFJs are known to naturally have extremely strong intuitive hunches about new people they meet, which helps most people with this personality type to avoid a good amount of toxic energy. However, some people are difficult to avoid, even for this natural people-reader. In fact, toxic personalities such as narcissists tend to prey on INFJ’s highly caring nature in such a way that they begin to doubt their innate intuitive feelings about the connection. Luckily, when an INFJ takes the time to learn to recognize the simple things that make them feel uncomfortable about a person, they don’t only have to rely on their intuition to give them insights. If someone makes an INFJ doubt themselves, their intuition, their feelings, their ideas, or they're worth, that’s a sure red flag. Other signs may include name-calling, demeaning remarks, unnecessary conflict, passive-aggressive jokes, and pessimism. If any of these signs should occur, run the opposite way INFJ, and fast!

Number 2:

Trust your intuition Speaking about INFJ intuition.. one of the biggest mistakes that a lot of INFJs make at least once in their lives is ignoring their persistent intuitive hunches towards a person. Some INFJs tend to wait until they've noticed far more red flags than they’d like to admit before finally making the move to distance themselves. So, in order to properly protect their energy, INFJs must learn to trust those gut feelings telling them that something is ‘off’ about a person. In these skeptical times, it’s best for this introspective personality to take a step back and do what they do best. Observe. How do they treat other people? How do they act in non-ideal situations? Toxic people are good at portraying themselves as innocent, charming, happy-go-lucky people so, it’s important for INFJs to not let that illusion get the best of them.

Number 3:

Visualize a barrier When we think of toxic people we automatically think of people we have the choice to be or not to be around, but quite frankly that isn’t always the case. Sometimes the most toxic people in our lives can be our parents, siblings, roommates, classmates, coworkers, and other people that make it not so easy to create that much-needed emotional distance. In these circumstances, it helps for an INFJ to visualize a literal barrier between them and their toxic opponent. With a complex imagination, this daydreaming personality type can visualize anything such as a brick wall, a metal door, an uncrossable stream, or anything else that acts to mentally separate them from the negative energy. Since INFJs have a tendency to absorb and mimic the moods and energies around them, this allows them to avoid being a victim against their will. Of course, this should be a temporary measure, as participating in any form of dysfunction for too long can really take its toll on the INFJ.

Number 4:

Don’t feel obligated to entertain negative behavior Gossiping, backstabbing, arguing, you name it. Most INFJs aren’t interested, no matter what the occasion. Sure INFJs love a good story, but when it comes to being a dumping ground for negativity and disrespect to others it can feel extremely violating for this type. When it comes to gossiping in particular, INFJs usually feel caught in between remaining friendly to the gossiper to avoid confrontation, but also not wanting to contribute or agree with anything being said to avoid being rude. This people-pleasing tendency can surely get this empathetic type into some sticky situations because as we all know, we can’t please everyone. With that being said, when an INFJ is able to stand up for their morals of boundaries and respect, they can say ‘no’ in times where they feel reluctant to entertain the said behavior. It takes practice, but this simple change can make all the difference for an INFJ when it comes to protecting themselves from toxic people.

Number 5:

Don’t allow loneliness to become desperation One of the many INFJ paradoxes concludes that although most INFJs don’t really mind being alone, they also crave to fit in with the people around them. The mental idea of living out some of their wildest daydreams intrigues this imaginative type, and sometimes they dream of fitting in.. besides the fact that they feel so different from others. The INFJ’s perfectionistic ways also make them wonder if their life is lacking in actual human experiences, questioning if they should have more friends or if they truly like their solitary lifestyle. While this is an ongoing mental battle for the INFJ, they need to be wary of letting down their guard too much in times where they feel a little desperate for human connection. INFJs need to be okay with making personal power moves such as leaving that party early, avoiding certain people they don’t connect with, and cutting off ties with toxic relationships despite an overwhelming obligation to please the other person.

Number 6:

Self-care over selfishness One of the biggest issues most INFJs and highly empathetic people face when protecting themselves against toxic people or situations is their narrative. INFJs don’t want to ever let other people down, so when it comes to setting boundaries they can feel extremely selfish, despite the fact that boundary setting is one of the best forms of INFJ self-care. When this people-helping personality type truly values their worth, they’ll begin to realize that the best thing they can do for themselves is saved their precious energy for the people who really deserve it in their lives. Naive INFJs may feel as if they need to save the world at the expense of their mental and emotional well-being when all that does is put them on the fast track to mental burnout. Not only does this change in the narrative allows an INFJ to more easily set boundaries and avoid negative people, but it also takes the guilt away from the situation - something that all INFJs struggle with when cutting ties.

Number 7:

Cleanse toxic energy With most INFJs identifying with being an empath, it’s well known that this personality type involuntarily soaks up the energy from those around them. In fact, certain INFJs can be so deeply affected by this stagnant and accumulating energy that they feel the need to physically or emotionally purge of this overwhelming burden. Built-up emotions can come out as an emotional uproar of tears and mental turmoil if not dealt with at the beginning stages. Therefore, it’s important for each INFJ to find ways that allow them to clear themselves physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually from the outside input of energy and information. For some people, this can be rigorous or relaxed exercise such as a bike ride through the forest or yoga in the park. For others, this may be something less physical like a guided ‘energy clearing’ meditation, listening to calming music, or even cooking their favorite meal. Anything that allows an INFJ a few minutes of mental clarity can allow them to reconnect to their own true feelings almost instantaneously.

Number 8:

Build a solid social circle Ha! INFJs and a social circle. Yup, we’re not kidding. As much as it may seem daunting for some of our more introverted INFJs, finding a group of people that are easy to relate to in some aspect of life can make all the difference for this misunderstood type. Because INFJs easily absorb the energy of others, it can be just as helpful for an INFJ to avoid negativity as it is for them to counter-balance it with some higher vibrations. This means, that even if the day was spent with cranky co-workers, a quick dinner with friends can completely rid an INFJ of all accumulated negativity from the day. For the shy INFJ, this can be as simple as moving towards people and activities that make you feel good, even if that means gravitating to that seemingly weird coworker everyone avoids or the unorthodox hobby.